If I have dedicated myself to anything over the past 37 years, it has been laziness. From my days as a child when one of my brothers had to carry me upstairs to breakfast to now when I will skip dinner because I don’t feel like microwaving popcorn, I have done all I can to avoid the extra step.

But I have seen some things lately that truly disturb me. I think our smartest people should spend their time making our lives easier, but they seem to have taken a wrong turn.

While walking around a store recently, I saw a contraption that sent me into a tizzy. I stood in the aisle and just shook my head.

Someone actually makes a machine that toasts bread or a bagel, cooks an egg and warms sausage so you can make a breakfast sandwich all in one place.

I love the breakfast sandwich and occasionally make them at home. But when did the toaster, stove and microwave end up in separate rooms in the house?

Seriously, people. Is it that hard to toast something while you cook something? Has scrambling an egg and putting pre-cooked sausage in the microwave gotten that difficult?

What made me even more upset than the machine itself were the positive reviews it has received online. These people just encourage manufacturers.

They are probably responsible for the new coffee makers that are now advertising the magic of one-hand dispensing.

When I saw one of these in the store the other day, I had to stop and look. One the box, they had a picture of a woman holding a baby and pressing her coffee cup against the button which let the coffee flow.

I ask again, has pouring coffee from a pot turned out to be an incredible imposition? I have pretty small hands, but I could pretty much manage to put my mug on the counter and tip the pot with one hand. Was I supposed to be using two hands all these years?

I probably even did it while holding Bridget when she was younger. Please don’t call Children and Youth Services on me. I didn’t know I could get coffee at the press of the button. Honest.

Kitchen gadgets don’t have a monopoly on excessive laziness. Now soap has gotten into the act.

At the risk of sounding like Jerry Seinfeld, what is the deal with this pre-foamed soap? I am always looking for ways to cut corners, but I never considered that rubbing my hands together would get too difficult.

As a parent, I love the stuff. I know that Bridget will get a good lather going whether she wants to or not. But they need to put an age limit on this stuff.

I think once you hit double-digits, you can make your own suds, but that’s just me. I’m getting really disturbed seeing this stuff in restrooms because that means we’ll never get rid of it.

Can’t we get back to developing better remote controls or planning for moving sidewalks everywhere? Those are the real problems facing America.