Growing up. I had a conflicted vision of my own intelligence. I placed into the higher levels of classes in school, but felt really intimidated by my siblings’ academic accomplishments.

I guess that’s natural for the youngest in a big family. As I got older, I managed to feel comfortable with my smarts and realized I had a pretty good head on my shoulders.

One thing, however, continually makes me question that belief. Sudoku.

I don’t remember exactly how I learned about the Japanese number puzzles. All I know is that my wife loves them, and I feel like a complete idiot every time I try to solve one.

For a while, I would sit down with a puzzle on occasion to see if things had changed. They never did. I would start to make some progress, then realize I had made more than one mistake and didn’t feel like starting from scratch,

Then we got a tablet as a family present for Christmas (or I bought one for myself and am willing to share), and my daughter downloaded a free Sudoku game. I thought I could resist the temptation to give it a try, but had no willpower.

When I started playing my first game, something seemed different. I tried to place a few numbers in boxes where I thought they belonged. That’s when I realized that she had set up the program to prevent you from your own stupidity. That was my kind of game.

I solved an easy puzzle in less than 10 minutes. I could get used to this kind of action, I thought. Then I realized that I needed to face my own demons. I loaded the app, turned off the help function and settled in for a game.

Thirty minutes later, I had cleared the screen twice so I could start from scratch and found myself no closer to a solution. So I took the tablet downstairs, complained about being stupid and went back to watching sports on television.

I shouldn’t have this problem. I have no problem with numbers. I like logical thinking. But something happens when you mix the two that jams my circuits. I get easily distracted and lose that logical train of thought.

The worst part is that this happens on the easy-level puzzles. I could see if I managed to solve those, but had trouble working up the ladder. But I can’t even get past the basics.

That makes me jealous of my wife. She’s very smart so I’m not surprised she can solve even the difficult-level puzzles. I just hate that she can do something I can’t.

For some reason, I decided to wade back into the fray on New Year’s Eve. As my daughter taunted me from the other room, I focused all my concentration on the numbers in front of me. I knew the nine had to go there and the three could not possibly fit in here. I slowly worked my way through the logic and emerged with a completed puzzle all on my own after only 30 minutes.

So I can say I accomplished that in 2012. Part of me wants to try another one, but I kind of like knowing that my winning streak sits at one puzzle. Why mess with a good thing?